How Not to Be Your Own Worst Enemy | Week 1
How not to be Your Own Worst Enemy
Discussion Guide - Pay Attention!
Have you ever met anyone who was their own worst enemy? Someone who undermined their relationships, career, finances, or success? It’s hard to watch. But the truth is, we all have the potential to be our own worst enemy. At times, we may ignore the tug of our consciences and sell ourselves on a questionable decision. In the Old Testament, we read an account of David finding himself in such a position, and his example can help us navigate our own dilemmas.
Discussion Questions
Have you ever had someone try to “sell” you on their bad decision? How did that situation play out?
When have you been your own worst enemy? Was there an internal conflict associated with the decisions that led to the regrettable outcome?
When are you most prone to sell yourself on a bad idea? What does it sound like? What’s your pitch?
How do you navigate a dilemma where circumstances seem to suggest one direction, but your conscience points in a different direction?
Read 1 Samuel 24:
After Saul returned from pursuing the Philistines, he was told, “David is in the Desert of En Gedi.” So Saul took three thousand able young men from all Israel and set out to look for David and his men near the Crags of the Wild Goats.
He came to the sheep pens along the way; a cave was there, and Saul went in to relieve himself. David and his men were far back in the cave. The men said, “This is the day the Lord spoke of when he said to you, ‘I will give your enemy into your hands for you to deal with as you wish.’” Then David crept up unnoticed and cut off a corner of Saul’s robe.
Afterward, David was conscience-stricken for having cut off a corner of his robe. He said to his men, “The Lord forbid that I should do such a thing to my master, the Lord’s anointed, or lay my hand on him; for he is the anointed of the Lord.” With these words David sharply rebuked his men and did not allow them to attack Saul. And Saul left the cave and went his way.
Then David went out of the cave and called out to Saul, “My lord the king!” When Saul looked behind him, David bowed down and prostrated himself with his face to the ground. He said to Saul, “Why do you listen when men say, ‘David is bent on harming you’? This day you have seen with your own eyes how the Lord delivered you into my hands in the cave. Some urged me to kill you, but I spared you; I said, ‘I will not lay my hand on my lord, because he is the Lord’s anointed.’ See, my father, look at this piece of your robe in my hand! I cut off the corner of your robe but did not kill you. See that there is nothing in my hand to indicate that I am guilty of wrongdoing or rebellion. I have not wronged you, but you are hunting me down to take my life. May the Lord judge between you and me. And may the Lord avenge the wrongs you have done to me, but my hand will not touch you. As the old saying goes, ‘From evildoers come evil deeds,’ so my hand will not touch you.
“Against whom has the king of Israel come out? Who are you pursuing? A dead dog? A flea? May the Lord be our judge and decide between us. May he consider my cause and uphold it; may he vindicate me by delivering me from your hand.”
When David finished saying this, Saul asked, “Is that your voice, David my son?” And he wept aloud. “You are more righteous than I,” he said. “You have treated me well, but I have treated you badly. You have just now told me about the good you did to me; the Lord delivered me into your hands, but you did not kill me. When a man finds his enemy, does he let him get away unharmed? May the Lord reward you well for the way you treated me today. I know that you will surely be king and that the kingdom of Israel will be established in your hands. Now swear to me by the Lord that you will not kill off my descendants or wipe out my name from my father’s family.”
So David gave his oath to Saul. Then Saul returned home, but David and his men went up to the stronghold.
What do you think was going on in David’s mind when an opportunity to change his circumstances presented itself in the cave with Saul?
What was at stake in David’s decision of whether to take matters into his own hands and kill the king?
How do you think it affected David’s legacy that he listened to his conscience and chose to allow God to determine the outcome?
How might it have shaped his standing as the next king of Israel?
Often, other people can make us aware of the tension in our decision-making. Who are the people in your life that you’ve given permission to ask you about those tensions?
When you feel tension in deciding, what would it look like to pause until you can pinpoint a cause of it? What would it look like to explore rather than ignore your conscience?
Moving Forward
When you face a dilemma, and there’s a tension you can’t quite put your finger on - don’t rush by. That tension may very well be God’s way of protecting you. If something bothers you about him or her, that offer, that invitation, that deal... you owe it to yourself to face it. Face that tension until it goes away, or you go a different way. What begins as an uneasy feeling is often supported later with reason and insight. But if you don’t pause, you won’t see it.
Is there a tension that deserves your attention? Pay attention. That’s a decision that will keep you from becoming your own worst enemy.