Love, Dates & Heartbreaks | Week 1
The Right Person Myth
In relationships, we often believe if we find the right person, it will make everything right. So we ask ourselves, “Is this the right person for me?” Maybe we need to be asking a different question—a question that shifts our focus from seeking the right kind of person to becoming the right kind of person.
Discussion Questions
When you think of romantic comedies, what movies come to mind?
While we know that real life is not like the movies, what is it about romantic movies that are appealing?
Have you found yourself believing either of these two myths? If so, which one?
The Right Person Myth: Once you meet the right person, everything will be all right.
The Promise Myth: A promise replaces the need for preparation.
What statements would you make that are more accurate versions of those two myths?
4. Read John 15:1–2, 4–5.
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.”
“Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.
What does Jesus mean to be “plugged into the vine”?
What is the result of doing this, and what would it mean for our current and future relationships?
5. Read John 15:9–10.
“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love.”
In this passage, Jesus sums up the commands with one. What is this one command? What does that command look like in a romantic relationship?
6. List three things that come to mind when you think about God’s love for you. What would it look like to extend those same three things to someone else?
Changing Your Mind
The kind of person Jesus leads his followers to become is the kind of person we are looking for and, ultimately, want to become. This week, evaluate the type of person you are looking for and ask yourself, “Am I becoming that type of person?” How can this group help you remain plugged into “the vine”?