Relationship Essentials | Release - Week 3
Big Idea:
The method we use to raise our children determines the weight of the challenge and depth of the reward.
Getting Started:
Not everyone reading this is a parent, but all have had a first hand look into the life of a parent. You either are one, hope to someday become one, or had parental figures in your life to watch how they did it. When it comes to parenting, raising your children the way you want them to live is the goal. The thing is, that takes effort and intentionality. Many parents feel as though they have missed the mark or failed and the
What are the top one or two lessons you learned from your parents or parental figures?
What about those qualities stuck with you the most?
Did you learn any traits from your parents because you watched what they did?
Digging In
Read Proverbs 22:6
The goal with children or the next generation is not to control them but to train them.
What is the difference between controlling and training a child?
What different effects would training or controlling a child have on their lives long term?
How can we plan to train a child instead of control their every move?
The best way to train children and the generation coming behind us is not just through the wisdom we share, but the actions we show to prove it.
Why would actions have more weight to them than words?
Are there any examples in your life of wise words that fell flat because a lack of action?
It is so important that we show our children what we want them to do instead of just telling them. For example, if we encourage them to be kind, but all they see is the opposite of that in us, it will be hard for them to understand what kindness really looks like.
One of the biggest goals as a parent is to prevent our kids from making the same mistakes we made, because we know how harsh the consequences can be. However, we often fail to invite our kids into that part of our past out of fear that they will get the wrong idea.
How can sharing our past with our kids or next generation help them?
What parts of your past are hard for you to share with those you hope to train? What is holding you back from sharing?
What is God able to do by us sharing our failures with kids?
Read Deuteronomy 6:5-7
These commandments are the core of what it looks like to train your child. As a parent, your primary relationship must be with God. Before your spouse, before your kids, before anything.
How do we actively place God above our spouse and children?
What are some things that would have to change in your life to make God the priority?
What is the outcome when our relationship with God is the priority of our parenting?
Next Step
Connect with another parent in your life group and discuss some things you plan to do to increase the intentionality of your parenting. Talk about how you can make God number one in your life or ways you plan to be more authentic and vulnerable with your child. Ask them to check in on you and see how it’s going and do the same for the other parent.
If you are not a parent find someone else who isn’t a parent and ask how they plan to teach and train their future children or next generation in their lives. There is a quote that says failing to prepare is preparing to fail. So use this time to prepare ways you want to be intentional with future children in your life.